Jun 8, 2010

A Real Woman...

So I came across two lists on The Rebelution blog that had the quality traits, each based out of scripture, of  "real" men & women. By real, I mean godly. The more guys that I meet, the more I realize how rare it is to know a guy who is really a leader. Someone who isn't afraid to talk about what God is doing in his life, be a gentleman, or be the one to make decisions. (Just an encouragement ladies, genuine, godly guys DO exist! You just have to be patient.) Yes, it's hard to hold out for a genuine, godly leader, but it's not all on the guys. There are a lot of girls who are making it very difficult for guys to step up & be what God intended them to be. Girls who flirt with guys, just for the attention; play with guy's emotions, or act silly, to be "cute." I'm guessing most girls do want to wait for a good, godly guy, but it is hard. One of the things that the Lord has been teaching me is this: you will attract what you are. Meaning, if you are truly satisfied in God, seeking to serve Him, & growing in your walk with the Lord, that is most likely the kind of guy you will attract. I see so many girls who are settling for any guy that shows them attention, so when I was reading the list of character strengths that three girls had put together to describe a "real" man, I wanted to just share it right away. I though, maybe if every girl saw the traits of a real man, they would be more willing to wait.  But we have to realize that we can't just put together a list of traits that we desire in a future spouse if we aren't willing to look at our own lives first & seek to become a "real" woman. Hopefully this is making sense. Lol! Sometimes things make sense in my head, but when I say them, or write them out, I confuse people =) Anyways, here is the list, compiled by three authors, of a "Real Woman." I challenge you to really dig into & find things that you need to work on & pray about over the summer. I know there are definitely points in here that I fall short on!

Written by Philip Hainline, Heidi Reimer, and Maria Reimer at the respective ages of 16, 19, and 17.

A real woman . . .

…is glad she’s a woman and rejoices in her femininity, expressing it through her attitude, appearance and bearing. 
(1 Timothy 2:9-10)

…does not compete for equality with men or chafe at God’s design for male and female, but delights in and understands the importance of her calling to complement man’s role. 
(1 Timothy 2:11-12, Ephesians 5:22-24)

…values the cultivation of her mind and diligently seeks after wisdom and knowledge. 
(Proverbs 22:17-21, 2:2-6)

…realizes her imperative need to allow the Holy Spirit to control her emotions and expressions of them. 
(James 1:19-20)

…does not wallow in self-pity or make a habit of voicing complaints, but radiates cheerfulness and joy. 
(Proverbs 15:15, Proverbs 17:22)

A real woman . . .

…appreciates her father’s protection, and respects and submits to his authority. In so doing, she is preparing herself to exercise the Biblical role in her relationship with a possible future husband.
(Ephesians 5:33-6:3, 1 Peter 3:1-2)

…is trustworthy and gains the respect of those around her.
(Proverbs 31:11)

…restrains herself from listening to, or participating in gossip, but instead speaks with wisdom and discretion. 
(Proverbs 11:12-13, 22, 20:19, 3:11)

…encourages and builds up those around her instead of criticizing and tearing them down. 
(1 Thessalonians 5:11, Ephesians 4:29)

…does not have a nagging, contentious or manipulative manner in which she deals with others. 
(Judges 16:16, Proverbs 21:9, 19, 26:21)

…is not boisterous or loud in her speech or actions but is characterized by a gentle and quiet spirit. 
(Proverbs 9:13, 1 Peter 3:4)

A real woman . . .

…portrays chastity, modesty and reverence in her manner, and wears the ornament of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is her true beauty. 
(1 Peter 3:3-4, Titus 2:4-5)

…is not offended by respect shown her through gentlemanly courtesies (opening doors, etc.) but cultivates the differences between the sexes that make her worthy of this deference. 
(1 Peter 3:7, Mark 10:6)

…seeks to make God her number one desire and the Lover of her soul, knowing that only He can fully satisfy. 
(Psalm 73:25, Psalm 63:1)

…uses her years of singleness to seek and serve God without distraction, and is content to leave the details of her future to Him. 
(Psalm 73:25, Philippians 4:11)

A real woman . . .

…does not relate to members of the opposite sex in a flirtatious or forward manner, but instead saves all her passion for her future husband. 
(Thessalonians 4:3-8, Proverbs 6:25, 1 Corinthians 7:1)

…holds her virginity before marriage sacred and will not compromise it for anything. (This one goes for guys too)
(1 Timothy 5:22)


  1. Alicia,

    Thank you so much for sharing this. Even though I am married it reminds me how I should behave towards my husband. I really hope this encouraged you as well as far as waiting for your future husband.Love you so much.

  2. This was really great Alicia! I am so blessed to have a friend that is so desiring to be changed into the likeness of Christ and act according to His Word. You have really grown in this area of your life, and I am so encouraged.

    Do not stir up of awaken love before it pleases. (Song of Songs 2:7)

  3. Amber, thank you! You have been such an encouragement in this area. Love you so much!

    Steph, that really means a lot to me. Especially since you were there through the rough times. You are such a huge blessing to me. Love you!!

    (Love that verse too!! =)