Lessons from the Cross

Recently I have been praying about something I've been struggling with. Maybe it seems like a little bit of an oxymoron unless you've been there yourself, but I was praying about prayer. I've had some difficult situations take place in the lives of myself, some of my friends, & also my family members lately. I know that in Matthew 5:45 it says that "rain falls on both the just & the unjust" & also in James 1:2 it says that we are to count it all joy when we fall into trials because the testing of our faith produces patience & perseverance. So I know that God has a purpose in every hardship that He allows, but I was kind of struggling because it almost seemed like God was just refusing to answer prayer. I hate seeing the people that I love in the midst of situations where they are hurting & crying out to God & it appears as if God has forsaken them. I know that it is not wise to question God, but I was honestly just struggling with this & I was to the point where I was pretty much challenging God to show Himself clearly in my life & in the lives of my loved ones who were hurting.

How foolish I am. God always answers prayers. Of course He has already shown Himself in my life time & time again, & I realized this. I just wanted to feel Him now. But thankfully we serve a God who is eternally gracious, loving, & Who shows unmerited favor for His children time & time again. 

 It is amazing how God speaks so clearly through scripture. In my devotions over the past week, it seems as if certain passages were written just for me. So when I was really questioning God about why He was doing something a certain way, I "just happened" to come across these passages. I'll let you in on a little bit of what was taking place in my head:

Me: "Lord, I don't understand! Why are you letting this situation take place in my life right now? This is not a good way to help me grow. Don't you know that my life is crazy enough? This is not what is best for me!!"

Isaiah 45:9 “Woe to you who strives with Him who formed him, a pot among earthen pots! Does the clay say to him who forms it, ‘What are you making?’ or ‘Your work has no handles’?"

Me: "Well Father, I wouldn't put it that way exactly. I mean, I wasn't really asking you what you're going to make out of this situation. I guess I was just...well, isn't there a better way? Less painful perhaps? Couldn't you do it, um, my way?"

Isaiah 55:8  "My thoughts are not your thoughts,

neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord."

Me: "I know that, Lord. I understand that Your ways are above my understanding, but would You be willing to hear me out if I made a few suggestions on Your course of action?"

Job 38:4-6 "“Where were you when I laid the foundation of the earth?

Tell me, if you have understanding. Who determined its measurements—surely you know! Or who stretched the line upon it? On what were its bases sunk, or who laid its cornerstone, when the morning stars sang together and all the sons of God shouted for joy?"

Me: "Ok, I wasn't there when You created the world. In fact, I haven't even been on earth for 20 years. I know that You know best, I just....Lord I need to understand why I can't see Your hand at work in the situations that my friends & family are going through."

God wasn't silent at this point, but I don't think I was truly listening for His voice. I was trying to walk by sight, not by faith. And as Hebrews 11:6 states "without faith it is impossible to please Him, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that he exists and that He rewards those who diligently seek Him."

But again, God is faithful. As I did my devotions in Matthew the other day, God used the story of Christ's persecution in a way that I have never experienced before.  As I read through Matthew's account of the crucifixion, I took note of Jesus's prayers to His heavenly Father. In the last hours before His capture, we see Jesus crying out to His Father in the garden of Gethsemane.

 In chapter 26, verse 39, Christ is aware of the pain & humiliation He is about to face. "And going a little farther He fell on his face and prayed, saying, 'My Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me; nevertheless, not as I will, but as You will.'"

  

If it was possible, but it wasn't. There was no other way that we could be redeemed & that God's will be done other than this Perfect Man to die in our place. Jesus Christ, the Son of God was crying out asking God if there was some other way for His will to be fulfilled. Just as I had been praying for a different way for God's will to be accomplished in my life. But there is a major difference between my prayer & Christ's prayer; nevertheless, not as I will, but as You will.

Christ was willing to do whatever it took to fulfill the will of God, even though it meant He would surrender His life. He didn't take the easy way out.

I was hoping that God would provide an easy way out of a difficult time, both in my life & the lives of my loved ones. But when has "easy" ever taught us anything? How much do we depend on God for strength when we feel like we've got everything under control?

But my learning wasn't done yet. As I continued reading the rest of the story through my tears, I noticed some other people who questioned God's ways. 

In chapter 27:42-43, as Christ lay on the cross, drawing shallow breaths, the Roman soldiers & angry crowd taunted Him: “He saved others; He cannot save Himself. He is the King of Israel; let Him come down now from the cross, and we will believe in Him. He trusts in God; let God deliver Him now, if He desires Him. For He said, ‘I am the Son of God.’”

I suddenly realized my actions in demanding that God prove Himself in my life were very similar to those of the soldiers who crucified Jesus Christ. What if God did follow human's silly whims? What would have happened if God would have accepted their challenge"prove" Himself on that day? The consequences are unimaginable!


 If God had indeed delivered His Son from the cross, we would be without a Savior. Think about it. It must have seemed insane & incomprehensible to the bystanders on that day that God was allowing His Son to be pierced & bruised by the hands of men. It didn't make sense that an all powerful God would allow His Son to die. What good, & what purpose could possibly be found in that? 

But thankfully God's ways are not our ways. He is so far above us in every way, & He used a seemingly tragic & hopeless situation to bring hope, life, & salvation into a desperate & dying world. All because He chose not to answer some prayers & challenges in the way that most of us would have expected. He had a purpose that could not be seen in the midst of the pain, but is clearly displayed now in the beauty of His love. If you are struggling with God's purpose in allowing pain into your life, have patience, keep the faith. God's hand is always at work even when we cannot see it, & He never wastes our tears. Persevere; God will reward you. Love you all!!

Long Time Coming

So, it has been quite a while since I have posted anything about what I've been up to in the past month & a half, so prepare yourself for a jumbled peek into my life lately (via pictures.) Lol =)

For the past five weeks I have been home from Northland for Christmas break. It has been a really refreshing & relaxing time. It was snowing really hard when everyone was leaving but I made it home safely & started Christmas break out right by preparing some extra special packages for our troops overseas. Back at Thanksgiving I asked our church family to donate Christmas cards to send to the soldiers & they responded generously!

Thanks to them we had over 500 cards that I was able to take back to college with me & they were filled out by the students there. We also stuffed them with tracts & sent a bunch of Christmas cookies. Hopefully the Lord will use those tracts in some of the soldier's lives.

I was also able to hang out with Katelyn (one of my best friends) a lot over break. I didn't think it was possible, but over these past five weeks Katie-lou & I have gotten even closer. It has been so much fun!! This past Tuesday she came over to my house for a movie, but I think that we had more fun after the movie. It was about 3 in the morning, right after boy talk & just before we started watching Tim Hawkins videos, when we started getting a little slap happy.  We were probably a little sleep deprived by that time, but it was still fun. Lol! ...Good times =)

Haha! This picture is from New Years Eve. The Rost family put together an amazing spread of appetizers for the party that we had at our church. It was a cruise theme, which was kind of ironic since it was about -5 outside. Lol. But anyways, I was given the job of toasting things, Stephanie made Won-Tons, & Caleb made this really good slushy stuff. Steph & I still thought we had better supervise though...you just never know with Caleb =)

Yummy!!

My sister Amber, her husband, & daughter Aubrianna were able to come up for a visit too. We had so much fun! We are very close, so it is always great to spend time together. Plus, my niece is getting so big already!!

My mom always complains about being called "grandma" now, but we all know she secretly loves it. How could she not with a grand-baby this adorable?!

One of the reasons Amber came to visit was to hear about our other sister's trip to South America in December. My sister Rebecca, her husband Ben, & 3 other couples went on a missions trip to Paraguay, South America in the beginning of December. They gave a presentation in our church on a Sunday night. Ben also announced that they had gotten an amazing deal on plane tickets: 3 for the price of 2! Turns out, my sister Becca is going to be having a baby in July =) Yay!!

One of the highlights of my break was welcoming my big brother Jeremiah home from his second tour in Iraq. I have missed him so much!! Its always hard being away from my brother, but knowing his life is in danger makes it worse. But God has been so good & He has definitely been protecting Jer-bear (Don't tell Jeremiah I called him that! Lol.)

Jeremiah's first time holding his niece. I believe his exact words were "AWWWWW!!!!!"

So all in all, a very good break. I know that this next semester is going to be especially trying, but I am looking forward to seeing what the Lord will teach me over the next 4 months. Thanks for stopping by! I'll try to be faithful in updating as I return to school =) Have a wonderful weekend!!!

What is God's Will?

Good morning!! So I just realized that I haven't blogged about what's going on in my life in quite a while now, so I promise I will do that soon. Hopefully before I go back to school. But this morning I had this video emailed to me & it was an encouragement to me, so I wanted to share it with you =) I love these guys! Lol. Enjoy.

Doers and Not Hearers Only

James 1:22 says"But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves."

What does the word say?

James 2:14-17 "What good is it, my brothers, if someone says he has faith but does not have works? Can that faith save him If a brother or sister is poorly clothed and lacking in daily food, and one of you says to them, “Go in peace, be warmed and filled,” without giving them the things needed for the body, what good is that? So also faith by itself, if it does not have works, is dead."

Unless you have been living under a rock for the past couple of days, I'm sure that you have heard about the heartbreaking tragedy that hit Haiti. I just want to ask my wonderful readers to consider what God would have you to do for these people in need. I know that money is tight for the majority of us right now, but we have been given so much here in America & with that privilege we have a responsibility to give to the needy. Even just a little bit helps! World Vision is an amazing Christian relief organization that I have been familiar with for years. They run an incredible child sponsorship program & I would highly recommend working with them if you are able to make a donation of any size.  Not only will they use your donation to provide for physical needs, but they also have a passion for sharing the gospel & meeting the spiritual needs as well. Here's a link to a website that will match your donation dollar for dollar: http://www.razoo.com/p/haiti And here's a direct link to World Vision's website: http://tinyurl.com/yjg3cy2 

For all of you texting addicts, you can easily make a $10 donation to the Red Cross by texting "Haiti" to 90999, the charge will just be added to your regular monthly phone bill. 

But above all, PLEASE be in prayer for the people of Haiti & the many volunteers that are either already there, or traveling to the country. As important as they are, don't just pray for physical necessities, but also be in prayer for the spiritual needs of the people. You may not have money to make a donation, but you can still impact the lives of Hatians in the midst of all of this chaos. I know that sometimes it may be hard to believe that prayer can really change things in such a tragic situation, but you can rest in the promises of God.

Jeremiah 32:27  “Behold, I am the Lord, the God of all flesh. Is anything too hard for me?"


John 14:13-14 "Whatever you ask in my name, this I will do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son. If you ask me anything in my name, I will do it."


Matthew 17:20 "He said to them, “Because of your little faith. For truly, I say to you, if you have faith like a grain of mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move, and nothing will be impossible for you.”


John 16:33  "I have said these things to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”


Don't make the mistake of limiting God with what He can accomplish when you act in faith. Whether it is by donating $5, or committing extra time in prayer for these poor people. Just as He did when He fed the 5000 with two small fish & five loaves of bread, the Lord can multiply your sacrifices & use them in ways that you can't imagine! Show these people the love of Jesus Christ in any way you can.  I challenge you to act on your faith; find some way to die to yourself the rest of this month so that you can afford to show love to those who are suffering, either in a monetary gift, or extra time in prayer.



2 Corinthians 5:14 "For the love of Christ controls us, because we have concluded this: that One has died for all, therefore all have died."

Dear World...

I'm writing this letter to tell you goodbye. More specifically, I'm writing this letter to the ruler of this present world; I want you to know that we're through. Satan, I've bought into your empty promises for far too long. All of the glitz & glamor that you so proudly display is nothing but a masquerade that weakly veils the true pain that you are so full of. All these years you have tried to seduce me into your way of thinking, & guess what? You succeeded...for a while. Your whispers led me to believe that I could gain happiness through material things. I became full of greed & grew jealous of what others had; so I hoarded my own money for no other purpose but to spend it on myself. Selfish envy infiltrated my life & my dissatisfaction was apparent. I wanted more! You knew this. You were well aware of the emptiness that my heart held. Happiness is not found in things, of this I was sure. But where then? You had an answer to this as well. Every waif of a model & stick thin body of a celebrity screamed your answer to me: You are not good enough as you are!! You will never achieve happiness until you attain an acceptable standard of beauty! This made me hate myself. So I decided that starvation was the answer. My body was obviously disgusting by the world's standards, why shouldn't I change it? I need to fit in! I need happiness! You were so close to achieving your goal of destroying me. I can almost imagine your face twisted into an evil grin of victory. You had succeeded in turning me focus so wholly on myself that I was totally unable to accomplish anything for the kingdom of God. In fact, I was not only abusing my body; God's temple, but I was also incredibly angry with my Maker. how could God have done such a horrible job in creating my body? Depression & inferiority became deeply rooted in my life. If only someone truly loved me! If only someone could reassure me that I wasn't completely unattractive. I only there was that one person who could sooth my irrational fears.
I gotta hand it to you Satan: Once again you & your worldly influences had an immediate answer for me. A boyfriend! You've seen the movies; everyone that has a boyfriend is perfectly happy. A prince charming will fix all of your troubles! I believed it, & I succeeded in finding myself a guy. A great guy who would take care of me, value my feelings, & fix my life? No. He called me beautiful, he went through some of the motions that are expected of a boyfriend. He said the right things, but he took so much. Satan, this lie hurt me deeply. I thought he cared, & I began to trust this man that I thought would make things better. But he failed because he only cared about his own desires. We were both selfish & we both got hurt. If I had made the choice that you offered me, I could have destroyed my life in that relationship, but it didn't happen! Satan, your grand scheme that you had been weaving for years was about to collapse. You know the rest of the story; you hate this part of the story. It was exactly this time last year when a real prince charming came into my life. He showed me the saving power of my salvation. My salvation that I had neglected for so long while I was chasing after your worthless lies. This Prince revealed to me the distinction between His Father's pure, beautiful promises, & the filthiness of your destructive lies. His name is Jesus Christ. Yeah, go ahead Satan, hide yourself in fear; the True Ruler of this earth came down from heaven to save me from the pit that you kicked me into.

I longed for peace & happiness; Christ satisfied me.
He showed me in His word that I have been created in the image of God. I am His masterpiece & I was made for a specific purpose.

I craved love & acceptance; God demonstrated His incredible love for me & how much He desires a relationship with me-- a silly human!
In Isaiah 43 He quiets my fears & comforts my soul as He describes His unending devotion for me. "Fear not, for I have redeemed you: I have called you by name, you are Mine. You are precious in my eyes, and honored, and I love you!"
The God of the universe loves me! I don't deserve it. I have already failed so much. I can never earn it, but guess what Satan?  You can never take it away from me. Never! Because God has made a single promise that is infinitely more powerful than all of you lies combined. I am His, & He is mine.
Romans 8:38-39 says it perfectly, so listen closely. "I am convinced than neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord."
That includes you Satan. So stop trying to make me feel guilty for all of the mistakes I've already made in my life. Yes, I am a sinner, & I will always be one. But Christ, in His unimaginable mercy, chose to become sin for me & to take my punishment. He declared that it was finished on the cross. And unlike you, He doesn't lie! Just like in Zechariah 3, you stand on the sidelines & accuse me; you try to paralyze me with shame. But the angel of the Lord has graciously taken my embarrassing,  filthy garments & replaced them with pure & righteous robes. I am no longer a slave to my fleshly desires because Christ overcame my sin when He rose from the grave. He's beaten you Satan-- you've lost!
Christ's mercies are new every morning. His faithfulness reaches to the skies. I have victory & strength in Him, so you can't control my life anymore. I love my true Prince Charming & He has promised to always be with me. So you can take your money, it means nothing to me. You can have your superficial beauty, my Savior's scars are more beautiful than anything imaginable. You can keep all of your prince charmings, I have my own. His name is Pure and Holy. Emmanuel; God with us. He suffered & died for me while I still hated Him, yet He loved me enough to save me from my sins; to save me from myself. He loved me enough to save me from you! Jesus has stolen my heart, my life is His & His alone. I was meant to live for so much more than the empty pleasures you have offered me. So that is why I write you this letter; my faith is in God. I don't want your lies anymore. Goodbye forever.
                                                                            ~Alicia

This Christmas Child

Luke 2:7

"And she gave birth to her firstborn son; and she wrapped Him in cloths, and laid Him in a manger, because there was no room for them in the inn."

“This Christmas child” Watch Him. Watch Him. Watch this Child, who grows into a boy, who grows into a man and is found to be so much more. Watch as He is born—among shepherds and angels and bright lights in the sky. Watch as He grows in favor and stature—as a youngster asking questions, giving answers, astounding teachers. Watch Him in the desert—a young man in prayer, with hunger and thirst and a calling from heaven.

Watch this strange northerner—with His calloused hands and radical ways—who grew up in “pagan” Galilee, whose brothers once thought Him unbalanced, and whose neighbors once drove Him out of town. Yet watch His authority, His acceptance, His patience. Watch Him touch the leper, heal the diseased, cleanse the impure. Watch Him teach the crowds to forgive and pray always.

Watch Him as He kneels—in a garden, and in anguish. “Father, if You are willing, please take this cup of suffering away from Me. Yet I want Your will to be done, not Mine” (Luke 22:42). Radical submission to a heavenly plan.

Watch as the Son of God is betrayed with a kiss. Watch as they arrest Him and His closest friends flee. Watch as He submits to a fate sketched before time. Watch as they spit on Him and hit Him and crucify Him on a tree.

Watch as one final breath slips from His lips—the sins of the world on the shoulders of one man. Then watch, yes watch, as the stone is rolled away; an empty tomb filled with hope, for He rose again!

Then watch as His name and His fame fills the world.

This God, this Man, this Boy. This Christmas Child. —Sheridan Voysey, Our Daily Journey

Bittersweet

Well, my first semester of college is officially over. Kind of hard for me to believe. I had an amazing semester; God has definitely taught me a lot since September. I have also made some amazing friends that I don't know how I ever lived without! It's so nice to be home, but I miss some of my friends already. Like Ashlee & Emilee (they're in the first picture underneath this paragraph =) they are pretty much my honorary sisters. I can talk to them about absolutely anything! They are always encouraging me in my walk with the Lord as well, which is such a blessing! I'm so incredibly thankful that God gave me such amazing friends!

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Emilee and Ashlee

Me and Emee

Ashlee and I

Another friendship I was thankful to develop was with an MK from South America named Krystle. She is actually from my home church, but I never really knew her since her family has been out on the field for the past several years. It's so funny, the first time Krystle & I met a couple of years ago, we really didn't like each other. But now we are very good friends! She is an awesome girl & a huge encouragement to me.

This was while we were "studying" for finals. We got a little dramatic after a few hours. Lol!

After the drama, we got a bit slap happy! Haha! ...good times =)

I'm also very thankful for the roommates that God gave me. Both Ashley (middle) & Liz (right) have been a blessing to me in completely different ways. It's so cool, because God knew exactly the right people to room me with, it has been awesome & I am looking forward to spending another semester with them.

So after an incredible first semester I am now home on break for five weeks & I have some amazing news: God is already opening up an incredible ministry opportunity! This semester in World History we were learning about the origins of the Islamic religion & after that lecture I felt a huge burden for the Muslim people. I started praying about it & God brought to mind a great couple from our church that are currently serving as missionaries to a community of Muslim people that live nearby. After speaking with them about it today, it looks like I will be able to help them over break & hopefully over the summer as well. I will be working as a tutor to Muslim women, so please be in prayer that through this position I will be able to share the good news of the Gospel, & also show them the love of Christ. Thank you all again for your prayers over this semester, I cannot tell you how much I appreciate it. I hope that you all have a wonderful week as we celebrate the birth of our Savior!

"For Christ also suffered once for sins, the righteous for the unrighteous, that He might bring us to God, being put to death in the flesh but made alive in the spirit." ~1 Peter 3:18