SO much has happened since I last updated, I won't even attempt to recap, but I will enter back into the blogging world relating the story that has had the biggest impact on my life over the last year =)
God is good to me, & He has recently begun to put it on my heart that I need to start recording & sharing the things He has done for me again. Thank you Amber for your encouragement; you are such a great motivator!
My Side:
Summer of 2012 started out fantastically.
I was at the Disneyland of the Midwest; Aka, Northland Camp
and Conference Center. This is the place where God has done an overhaul on my
life, in more ways than one. Northland has had a huge impact on me spiritually
since I first arrived as a camper when I was 16 years old. Little did I know
that this summer would so drastically change my life.
As a teen counselor, things got busy…I mean, so busy that
sleep is a rarity! But the dependence on God that was cultivated those 8 weeks
deepened my spiritual walk like nothing I had ever experienced. I saw campers I
had labeled as “hopeless” be overcome by the gospel & set aside the sins
& the weights that had littered their lives. I saw my fellow staff members
transformed by Hebrews 12, the passage of focus we were studying that summer. I
also saw the Lord change me & give me a desire & thirst for Him like
never before.
In the midst of all of these incredible blessings, there was
yet another layer of change that the Lord was orchestrating. Enter Mr. Titus
Scott. Fellow camp worker. Program guy. Former Team Lead. And little did I
know…my future husband.
I was a girl who had never had dreams of wedding bells, or
finding prince charming, but had been praying for several years that if God saw
fit to bring a man into my life, that it would be a guy who loved God more than
he would ever love me. A man who consistently put others above himself, served
with humility, showed confidence & knowledge in the scripture, and lived in
a way that demonstrated a passion for the gospel….pretty high orders, yes?
Exactly...
God had brought me to a place through different trials &
disappointments in which I was quite content with being single, & I had in
fact already made plans of exactly what I would do after graduation, & it
seemed to me that God was blessing the decisions I was beginning to make for
the future.
Then, about half way through the summer the Lord began
shifting some things in my life…he brought various trials, and through each
one, He brought growth. But it had begun to challenge some of what I had begun
to plan for life after college. In one particular situation, I was still
grappling with what the Lord was doing in my life. So I began to pray, “Lord, I
don’t understand…can you please just make things in my life go back to how they
were?” But then God convicted me…I wasn’t praying according to His will, I was
praying according to mine.
Here’s where the story gets odd, & I see the
fingerprints of God all over it.
The very last week of camp, I prayed that prayer, & God
convicted me of praying according to what I wanted, so I prayed instead
(admittedly, somewhat hesitantly), “Lord, please change me through this trial,
& reveal to me what you want me to see & learn through it.”
It was that very day that God brought Titus to my mind…it’s
not like I was set on getting in a relationship that summer, so the fact that all
of the sudden there was this guy on my mind that I barely knew was a little
odd. So I thought back on all I knew about this program guy named Titus.
I hadn’t really taken a special interest in him until this
point, but he had always stuck out in my mind as very dependable, humble, kind,
and as a guy who did the jobs that no one else really wanted to.
I also began thinking through the characteristics I had
hoped for if ever I were to be married, and with the little I knew about Titus,
from what I could tell he fit a good deal of them.
So, I did what any girl would have done; I texted my mom
& told her that when she came up to get me from camp she would also get to
meet her future-son-in law! No kidding, this part of the story may have
actually been a little creepy if nothing had worked out, but since Titus &
I will be married, I feel a little less awkward about it.
I had such a strong, unexplainable feeling that this was the
man God wanted me to marry, I was surprised at myself!
One problem---we had 4 days left of the summer & then I
wouldn’t see him again for at least a year.
God was so good though, because I had such a strong
confidence that it was His will for us to be together, I felt perfectly at
peace about waiting, and felt no need to try to manipulate the situation in the
few days we had left.
So as I saw Titus around those last few days, I had
absolutely no idea if he was interested or not!
It wasn’t until Friday, when I had a short interaction with
him by the Liquidator (the big water slide for those of you who are not fluent
in the Northland camp dialect) that I began to pick up that Titus might, just
might be interested…but again, it was the last day, so I really tried not to
read too much into it.
Finally, it was the last Saturday and I was getting all
packed up & loading up the car to come home. As I had promised, I pointed
out Titus to my mom, (referring to him once more as her future son-in-law.
Haha!) As she and I pulled out of the parking lot, I saw Titus and Aaron Coffey
talking near the sidewalk, they waved goodbye, I waved back, as I said to my
mom “I’ll bet you anything they are talking about me.” Yes, very narcissistic
looking back on it, but I just had this weird feeling (and I was right, so it’s
not that weird, right? ☺ ).
In my mind, leaving Northland sealed the deal, that God
really did have a plan for Titus & I, but it wasn’t going to begin
unfolding until the following summer. I had begun writing prayer requests on
note-cards, and so that Sunday night I wrote a prayer card for Titus, & for
myself regarding Titus. I prayed that God would allow me the peace &
confidence to wait on the Lord & not grow discontent over the next year as
I waited, & I also prayed for Titus, that God would continue deepening his
relationship with the Lord.
I got up, turned off my light, turned down my covers, &
had just laid my head on my pillow when I heard my message indicator go off on
my ipod (literally less than two minutes after I finished praying for Titus,)
and I looked, & all I saw was the name “Titus Scott,”& I knew why he
contacted me!
Titus tells this better than I do, but basically, he had
contacted me to ask if we could keep in touch & get to know each other
better, & see how the Lord leads.
I was SO excited! I saw this as directly from God, but of
course I didn’t want to seem too anxious, so I read the message, & went to
sleep, & it was just after camp, so I slept in quite a bit the next day. I
talked to my mom about it, prayed about it, & then responded to Titus &
told him I would love to keep in touch.
The very next day, I was in 2 Corinthians 7 & 8 as part
of the devotional study I had started the previous week…this is where I just
see God’s sense of humor. Take a look at some of the verses I read as part of
my devotions just a day after Titus & I began communication:
• “But God, who comforts the downcast, comforted us by the
coming of Titus, and not only by his coming but also by the comfort with which
he was comforted by you.” (2 Corinthians 7:6-7)
• Therefore we are comforted. And besides our own comfort,
we rejoiced still more at the joy of Titus, because his spirit has been
refreshed by you. (2 Corinthians 7:13)
• “But thanks be to God, who put into the heart of Titus the
same earnest care I have for you.” (2 Corinthians 8:16)
• “As for Titus, he is my partner and fellow worker for your
benefit.” -2 Corinthians 8:23)
That made me laugh! I had to share it with my mom &
sisters ☺
In the months Titus & I have been deepening our
relationship, God has just blessed us in a very special way. It has been
difficult to deal with “the distance.” But the long-distance has actually
served to deepen our communication skills & also learn to trust the Lord
better to help the other person when we can’t be together. As I got to know
Titus, I was continually thankful for all those things I was first attracted to
him for, but my thankfulness has grown as I’ve gotten to know him in a much
deeper way. He really seeks to serve me & those around him in a way that I
really respect & admire. He often challenges me with the truth of God’s
word. And we just have a great time together! In the first several weeks I
spoke to several mentors & spiritual leaders in my life that I really
trust, many of whom have known Titus for longer than I have, and their
confirmation of Titus’ character & their approval of our relationship gave
me even more confidence that it was God’s will we marry.
December 27th was the awesome day of our engagement! We had
just returned to his grandparent’s farm after spending Christmas with the Scott
family in South Carolina. It was a beautiful day, with fresh snow on a really
amazing landscape. Titus had been pretty quiet all day, & he had completely
convinced me that we would not be getting engaged over Christmas break. So I just
assumed that he was tired, or maybe he was grumpy. Haha! So finally he asked me
if I would like to go for a walk out in the woods, which of course I did!
So we bundled up & he showed me around the farm, he was
talking a bit more by this point so I no longer thought he was grumpy, just a
little reserved ☺
Then when we began to head out towards the woods, he got
quiet once more, so I just enjoyed the scenery. It really was beautiful!
We got to a small pond out in the woods, & I turned
around to say something to Titus, & he was down on one knee with a ring
(which was even more beautiful than the scenery!), and asked me to be his wife!
Of course I said yes!
We called our families, & also the Coffey’s, another
family that has been very influential in both of our lives. It was such a happy
moment to share with loved ones!
Since then, we have been continuing to learn more about each
other & more about what a Christ-centered relationship truly looks like.
God has certainly given us very specific & almost identical burdens for
future ministry, & we are looking forward to taking that next step in the
future. But right now, I am just so deeply thankful for how God has so clearly
worked in our lives to bring us together, & I cannot WAIT to marry my best
friend. August 6th: be there!
His Side:
Summer 2012 at Northland Camp, a summer that God would use
to change most everything in my life. I
have the privilege of teaching during the school year and then spending my
summer working at Northland Camp. I
always look forward to how God changes me as I study through the theme passage
set aside for each summer! Little did I
know how God would change my life, summer of 2012!
During the first week and a half, we spend quite a bit of
time under great preaching and teaching of God’s Word. This summer one of the sessions that had the
most impact on my life was when Aaron Coffey shared from Philippians
4:6-7. He challenged us regarding fear
and worry, which tends to cloud our minds and hearts. God used His words to challenge me when he
pointed out that if I prayed every time that I started to worry, two things
would happen. My prayer life would be
increased and the amount of fear in my life would greatly decreased. God was teaching me this lesson early in the
summer because I was going to need it over the course of the summer.
As the summer began, I did not think that I would developing
an interest and relationship with Alicia Ball.
I knew a little bit about Alicia from the previous summer when she was a
lifeguard and I was a team leader. She
also had been my sister’s roommate during the previous school year at NIU. I think that before I was willing to admit it
to myself, God was beginning to point my heart towards Alicia. I began to notice many characteristics of her
life that I was very attracted to. As
the summer continued to progress, I began to realize how much I was being drawn
to get to know Alicia better. Through
the summer, I was able to see her heart and desire to serve God and those
around her. The more I saw the joy that
she consistently exhibited while serving campers through the grueling schedule
of camp solidified the desire to get to know Alicia better! This is where the lessons God had been
teaching me really became evident. As I
attempted to determine how I should pursue the possibility of a relationship with
Alicia, I came to a point where I realized that I was beginning to worry about
whether I would “stand a chance”! As
these worries began to take hold, I was reminded of the challenge from Aaron. I came to the point where I recognized those
worries actually were being shown in a lack of trust in God! As I came to this realization, I decided that
I would take Aaron’s challenge and pray every time I started to feel worried
about this situation. This was exactly
the point God wanted me to come to! The more
I started to trust in God, the more I was at peace with waiting on the
possibility of a relationship for as long as I needed!
Throughout this whole time, I continued to learn more about
and become more attracted to Alicia and her servant spirit. At this point, she was still not interested
in me, and looking back on it, I believe that is why God brought me to the
point of being willing to wait. It was
the very beginning of the last week of camp that all of a sudden I noticed a
slight change in Alicia and her interaction with me. As I continued to pray about the possibility
of a relationship, I again found myself at the place where I decided that in
order for me to truly trust God, I needed to wait until He made in completely
clear that I was to pursue a relationship with Alicia. The last day of camp was probably one of the
hardest of the summer for me. I was
spending a lot of time praying just putting my faith in God and knowing that
even if it were not until the next summer, Alicia would be worth the wait! I
was speaking to Aaron Coffey as Alicia was preparing to leave and I asked him
to pray for me to trust God and that I would clearly understand God’s timing
regarding a relationship.
It’s amazing to me how quickly God works sometimes. It was the following Sunday that I felt a
complete peace about moving forward with a relationship. Well, I had peace that it was time for me to
approach Alicia! I did not have any peace about what her response might be! I
spent several hours putting together a message to her explaining my desire to
pursue a relationship! After sending it,
I was able to see that she had received the message, but then had to wait until
the following afternoon to hear back from her.
From that point on it has seemed like such a whirlwind! God has done such a work in both of our lives
bringing us together and growing us as individuals and as a couple. Buying the ring and planning the proposal was
such a fun event in my life! I made a
goal to surprise her, even though it was going to be obvious where our
relationship was heading! I spent a lot
of time trying to convince her that I would not be able to get engaged during
the Christmas break, only to successfully surprise her on December 27 while at
my grandparents farm, a place that now holds a doubly special place in my
heart! Getting to know Alicia has
brought so much joy and fun into my life.
I am so thankful for how God has worked and I am so excited to see what
God will continue to do in our lives.
